I thought the second episode of “I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here” would be more watchable without Heidi Montag and her husband Spencer, neither of whom I had heard of before yesterday. I also thought it would suffer an immediate ratings failure and death.

I forgot how America loves a train wreck. Spencer and Heidi whoever are not only back, they are probably going to spike the ratings.

Reality television is supposed to be escapist and entertaining. This show is non-stop, wall-to-wall whining –by all of them, except, so far, Patti Blagojevich. She’s the only half-normal person on the show.

Tonight’s episode opens with a former NBA star crying because his apology for a crude statement to Janice Dicksonson wasn’t accepted. Who are these people? Is anyone besides Stephen Baldwin, who was a contestant on Celebrity Apprentice, even remotely recognizable? Is anyone not tethered to a hospital bed watching?