Bachelor Pad: And The Real Winner Is…

Face it. The Bachelor Pad sucked. Horrible show, torturous to watch. But, guess what? The finale was good. The right couple won, but the real winner is comeback kid of the year, Wes Hayden.

To recap: Congrats to Dave and Natalie. Of the two final couples, they were my fave by miles. I’ve always liked Natalie, she has so much moxie and not an ounce of fake goody-two shoes-ness. Dave really rehabilitated himself from his angry, psycho, over-macho performance on Jillian’s season, something I never would have thought possible. I actually liked him on this show.

But my favorite part, and I’ll bet I’m not alone, was Wes and Gia. They make a great couple, and he’s so due some love after the way the show trashed him with its hatchet-editing job on Jillian’s season. I’m glad Chris Harrison acknowledged it — and they let him sing at the end.

I doubt Kiptyn and Tenley will make it, she’ll drive him crazy with her helium voice and two note repertoire, little girl giggles or crying. I don’t care about them one way or the other, but I really hope Wes and Gia last. I think Gia is the best looking woman to appear on the show, all seasons combined, and she seems to have a big heart to match. Elizabeth? Yikes, run for cover. Nikki? Loosen up girl, you come across like a grandmother. Memo to Michelle: Karma’s a b*tch. Which is why you should have forgiven Tenley when she apologized (for the third time.) It will come back to bite you.

As to those who say the Bachelor shows are real just because they aren’t scripted: They may not be scripted down to lines people say, but it surely is the most manipulated reality show in television. Example: A finale contest with ballroom dancing when Tenley’s background is in dance. What was that about? The show needed her and Kiptyn to be in the final two, and the only way to arrange it, was to make the contest a slam dunk for her. Did you notice the judge’s scores for the other couples were a disconnect from their comments and facial reactions? They would have scored Dave and Natalie higher, and Jesse and Elizabeth, who had her typical alzheimer’s moment during the performance causing her to forget all her moves, much lower, but they had earpierces in. Is anyone naive enough to think they weren’t getting instructions in their ear from the control room?

Related: Melissa looked stunning. Even her “baby bump” was cute. She really should have gotten the hosting job on DWTS over the Princess of Blandness, Brook. At least Melissa’s spontaneous, happy, but not in a fake way, and can come out with the honest, unpredictable quip.

As for Natalie, I think she’d be great in a reality show about an LA bartender, kind of an updated version of Cocktail, where she has the Tom Cruise role. From there, who knows, maybe her own clothing and shoe line.

So while I’m really glad Natalie and Dave won, and I hope they stay friends, to me the real winner was Wes. He he didn’t get any money, so do yourself and Wes a favor and buy his album. It’s really good. If he ever comes to play in Denver, I’ll be there to hear him. You can friend him on FB and Twitter. He personally answers messages, and sometimes will write on your FB wall. I ‘ve known for a long time he’s the real deal. And just think, with the royalties he earns from your purchases, he might be able to afford more plane tickets to visit Gia.

One last note: In a post-show interview, Chris Harrisson was sounding the death-knell for Chris Lambert as the next Bachelor. He’s right: Just because a guy is nice and good-looking, doesn’t mean he’d shine in the role. If I were casting Chris, I’d put him in a network show, like a rerun of Lifeguard, where his job is to save little kids from drowning every week.

And that’s a wrap. I hope this is the one and only Bachelor Pad I have to suffer through.